Posted by KARLA on April 23, 1999 at 09:39:51:
In Reply to: Feeling low posted by Jake on April 22, 1999 at 17:07:36:
: You feel like shit, Jake, because you are human. Regardless of what the situation in your marriage was, or regardless of you being the one to initiate the divorce, you once cared for your wife very much, and maybe a
small part of you still does, even though you want out. That doesnt mean you dont care for her, as a person anyways. Hell, you spent alot of your life with this woman, it is only natural to feel some guilt. BUT, you cant let
guilt run your life. You have spent too much of your time doing that already. You say that taking care of your wife and daughter has been your whole life, but dont forget, you also said you felt as if you had no life.
Of course you dont want to put your daughter in the middle, but unfortunately, that is what is going to happen. You love her, and want her, and so does your wife, I assume. You have to do what is the best for the child, and regardless of how
guilty that makes you feel now, it will work out in the long run. Your daughter needs you, dont forget that. From your previous posts, so does your wife, I mean, she needs you to take care of your daughter, as she is incapable. She does not need you
to take care of her, you can not play that role forever!!!
Let me tell ya, when I went back to my husband to work things out, it was partly becuase I couldnt stand the thought of missing out on the times when my daughter was with him, instead of us. I hated the thought of not always being there with her, and for her.
I know that is selfish, but it is the truth, and now, I wish that I had never ever went back, because we are at square one again, and now, have to go through it all again.
Knowing that I was there with my daughter, was just not enough to keep a dead marriage together, and it is not for lack of love for her, because she is number one in my life. I guess I am just not one of the people who can endure years of misery that way.
Are you really?? Dont you deserve a normal, happy life? Dont you deserve to give that to your daughter? I mean really happy, and not some put on make believe happiness?