You've been in experimental mode for a few months now. But there will come a time when you feel ready to delve a bit deeper, exploring one-on-one intimacy with a special man or woman. There will come a time when you feel ready, once more, to entertain the notions of caring, closeness, commitment, and love.

If you've reached this point, no doubt you've also arrived at the following truism: Although hoping for a true love relationship can be relatively simple, finding a person to love can be pretty tough. You will not fall into such a relationship simply because you want to. Instead, you will probably engage in the arduous process of sifting through the candidates, having coffee with this one and seeing a movie with that one. You might spend months, even years, engaged in casual--though not experimental--dating, until you hit upon someone who just feels right.

If you keep meeting people, if you keep living your life, you'll meet your new life partner--as long as you are really ready to open yourself up to risk. The time and place of that meeting, of course, may be a matter of serendipity, written in the stars, not this book.

While some are lucky to meet people with whom they eventually connect, we've found that the majority of people encounter more problems. Many go to great lengths to engineer meetings, pursue their romantic interests, state their intentions, and find new love at last. If all you want is someone to love, then three years of "the dating thing" can feel like a stint in the Gulag. But it needn't be so. If you maintain a sense of optimism (and a sense of humor), you might find you enjoy your new quest for true love. After all, you are on a journey. Even if arduous and sometimes painful, it will still be exciting and interesting and--with the right attitude--a lot of fun.

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